Friday, November 7, 2008

Palin: Aftermath

While the Republican base is deciding on whether to name Sarah Palin queen bee of the conservative movement and gloriously follow her brutal commands or murder her violently and bury her shallowly, McCain stooges are leaking information in an attempt to...I don't know....prove she's incompetent and thus they were incompetent for choosing her? I'm not sure I understand their motives for burying her further, you geniuses were the ones that picked her. So here's some of the stuff they leaked.
  • Palin did NOT know Africa was a continent.
  • Did not know South Africa was a country.
  • She did NOT know who the parties to NAFTA were. [Hint: U.S., Canada, Mexico]
  • Tried to deputize a beef brisket.
  • She threw dramatic temper tantrums over bad press.
  • Had to be reminded to breathe once.
  • Walked around chief staffers wearing only a towel and a smile.
  • She refused to prepare for the Gibson or Couric interviews.
  • Wrote "Couric" on a moose then tracked it and killed it from a helicopter.
  • Spent much more than the reported $150,000 on clothes.
  • Was sued by the creators of the Andy Griffith Show for folksiness infringement.
So thanks McCain camp for letting us all know she was as dumb as we gave her credit for. So what's that make you? You decided not to vet her or really interview her before you grafted her ass to your campaign like a parasite attaching itself to a another, similar parasite. So bravo for the post-election bloodletting, I'm sure there's even worse stuff you're saving for the book deals. Remember, as bad as it makes her look, you still thought it was a great idea to pick her despite it. I'm sure that won't haunt you forever.

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