So a Democrat won something last night and they aren't going to take it back. Some states still aren't finished tallying, but it looks like Obama got 349 electoral votes with North Carolina's 15 looking to be added into his column later, and John McCain got sweet fuck all, I mean 163 electrical votes with Missourah's 11 likely to be added to his column. Not all the votes have come in, but Obama currently stands at 62,919,102, McCain at 55,724,169. This means that for the first time since Carter won in '76, the anti-American/Fake America parts of the country definitively outnumber Real America and pro-America parts. Terrorist fist jabs abounds!
What does this teach us? Well apparently the pundits think that this overwhelming victory for Obama means....he shouldn't take this as an affirmation of the liberal agenda because despite the large margins of democrats in the House and Senate, his big victory, and the millions and millions who voted to support his policies all really believe that he should enact some center-right version of all his policies. Democrats winning is never an affirmation of Democratic ideals, apparently. Tom Brokaw was apparently doing interviews all morning saying that it you counted land mass, John McCain won and thus this is a center-right nation. See Tom, we abolished the right of square footages of land to be able to vote back in ought six, people now hold the right to vote and they went for the left agenda....big time.
Other things that happened, apparently there was some massive conspiracy to deny Tim Robbin's the right to vote. At least he though so. A black man being elected broke the View's Elizabeth Hasslebeck's little ferret brain. Will.i.am has been on TV talking about politics entirely too much. Oh yeah, FUCK YOU CANADA! We don't need the protection of your flag overseas anymore! We can actually admit we're Americans in London or Berlin now. Eat it! Back to little brother status. Also, the students of GW and Georgetown gathered outside the White House last night after Obama won, for the sole purpose of celebrating and taunting Bush.
Other things that happened last night? Al Franken apparently lost the Minnesota Senate race by 570 votes. Some true scum like Marilyn Musgrave got tossed from Congress, but crazy Michelle Bachmann and Mitch McConnell squeaked through. Ted Stevens might have held on to win because Alaska is comprised of morons. Also, the gay marriage banning amendments seemed to squeak through again, especially in California. Turnout wasn't actually that high, rolling in at around 2004 levels, aka the last "most important election of our lifetimes". Democrats in the Senate will be about 57, the House will have 258 of them skittering about.
Now we get to enjoy the weeks of speculation about the Obama cabinet and potential Supreme Court appointments (Chuck D!) for the couple of judges who were holding on until a Democrat got elected, the final vote tallies in states that don't know how to count ballots fast, millions of stories about happy black people, and the impending expulsion of Ted Stevens from the Senate by Harry Reid. Also, John McCain will try to claw his way back up the mountain to respectability, hoping that the exultation over Obama's victory will cause everyone to forget that he acted like a rotten little sniveling shit for the past couple of months. Bush broke it and Obama bought it, now he has to fix it. Good luck, Dubya smashed into tiny little shards.
No comments:
Post a Comment