Friday, November 28, 2008

You stay classy, shoppers!

Wal-Mart Shoppers Trample Man to Death
Police say a Wal-Mart worker has died after being trampled by a throng of unruly shoppers shortly after the Long Island store opened Friday.

Nassau County police say the 34-year-old worker was taken to a hospital where he was pronounced dead at about 6 a.m., an hour after the store opened. The cause of death was not immediately known.

A police statement says a throng of shoppers "physically broke down the doors, knocking him to the ground." Police also say a 28-year-old pregnant woman was taken to a hospital for observation.
Our first sale related death of the season. Who says the economy has dampened our shopping instincts? We still know to stomp a man to death so we can be the first over to the table of discounted, irregular sweater vests. Props for fucking up the pregnant woman too. No malady, pregnancy, or infirmity will garner sympathy in the discount pits.

Wal-Mart, where even human life is cheap!

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