You've made Ted Stevens angry, you wouldn't like him when he's angry

When he is discussing issues that are especially important to him, Stevens wears a necktie with The Incredible Hulk on it to show his seriousness.

Ted Stevens, Hulk aficionado, the Senate Majority Project's "Drama Queen of the US Senate", creator of "The Bridge To Nowhere", the man who knows the internet is not a truck but a series a tubes, and longest serving Republican Senator, was indicted today on 7 criminal charges, severely clogging said tubes in the blogosphere.

They range in seriousness but the big one is for failing to report gifts in excess of $250,000 dollars that included a new first floor, garage, wraparound deck, plumbing, and electrical wiring for his vacation home, a Viking gas grill, furniture and tools. The gifts were, unsurprisingly, from oil services company VECO Corp. Stevens is, unsurprisingly, for drilling the arctic. He wore his Hulk tie to show how serious he was about drilling. For serious.

It's hard to see how Stevens got off so light. Fellow Alaskan congressman Don Young is under investigation for similar charges, VECO CEO Bill J. Allen admitted to bribery and in court papers acknowledged making $243,000 in illegal payments to Ted Stevens son Ben, an Alaskan state senator, and VECO VP Rick Smith also pleaded guilty to bribery. Everyone around him is going down for bribery and corruption and he's, as of yet, only been charged with making false statements and failing to report his graft and dirty dealings. He's vowed to fight the charges, but it's hard to see what his defense will be based on when essentially a company liked his stoogery and boot licking so much they decided he needed an extra story on his house and that his son could use a quarter mil in fuck around money.

Per Republican Senate caucus rules he can no longer serve as chairman or ranking member of a committee because of the indictment. Stevens is a ranking member of the Senate Commerce, Marvel Comics, Science, Tubes, and Transportation Committees. But he does get bonus points from the caucus for this scandal not being an embarrassing sexual one.

NOW has a corruption timeline and the Alaska Daily News has a rundown of everyone involved.