Maliki throws down the gauntlet

"U.S. presidential candidate Barack Obama talks about 16 months. That, we think, would be the right timeframe for a withdrawal, with the possibility of slight changes."

"Whoever is thinking about the shorter term is closer to reality. Artificially extending the stay of U.S. troops would cause problems."

Nuri al-Maliki done did it now. He didn't just re-iterate his support for American troop withdrawal, he said he was for Barack Obama's specific plan of a phased 16 month withdrawal. Withdrawal, not the language sodomizing "Phased Vague Event Horizon Leave Possibility Eventuality Subjecttochanguality Thing" that Bush snorted up and hocked onto the ground yesterday.

Apparently Maliki sees US occupation as a real wall standing in front of their legitimacy and independence as as government. He also does not fear an overthrow once troops leave. But most critically if you want to argue for more time in Iraq you have to argue against the people of the two countries and the government of Iraq.

Maliki is the guy John McCain himself said whose lead we should follow in Iraq, and the guy just overtly endorsed the Obama plan. He knows Obama is about to visit there and he overtly went out of his way to drop himself into the debate to rebuke Bush and McCain. Does this get covered as the giant elephant in the room it is or do we get months upon months of more "McCain says this but Obama says this" without a true realization of what everyone except the Republicans seem to already know: there are no good solutions, this war was a mistake, we fucked it up, we need to go, we aren't helping.

It's unknown what McCain is doing with the remnants of his shattered testicles after this groin kick, but campaign insiders have told These Bastards that he has put on order the stones needed to tell the Iraqi leader that we're gonna be there forever plus a day. Anyone like the sound of 200 years?

What's this mean? It's gonna be AWKWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD at the next US/Iraq conference call. Condi is gonna be all "No you di-int!" and Bush is going to be super pissed because the war on terror is supposed to be waged for explicitly Republican partisan purposes, not Democratic. But more importantly McCain and his frenemy Bush are going to need a new dishonest line of attack. We thrashed the TB foundlings and orphans from our Satire Industrial Complex in Jakarta for a few hours until they gave us some suggestions for McCain.

• Just pretend it didn't happen and continue saying the same stuff. Claim in actuality that Maliki is agreeing with you. Or suggest again that Maliki misspoke or there was a transcription error. (This came from Sutjatmi and is probably what will happen, which is why he always gets extra gruel rations.)
• Go after Obama like Yudhoyono goes after the bakso and rambutan at a charity badminton match for Pramoedya Ananta Toer. (This is too 'inside Jakarta'. Merpati will be locked in the shame shed with the adjudicator.)
• Maliki is just showing solidarity with his Muslim brother Barack. (Good one Chahaya: racist, obscures the issue, and is condescending)
• We aren't leaving till we get the oil we came for. Energy independence! (Massively cynical Setaiwan, you'll go far here)
• Freedom. 9/11. (Not nearly conniving and patriotic enough Fat Mike, that stuff went out the window two years ago. Go spend your afternoon with the rods of beating)

We hope to have been of some help John.