Monday, September 8, 2008

Geopolitical wang measuring

Russia says to send battleship to Caribbean Sea
Russia will send a nuclear-powered battleship to the Caribbean for a joint naval exercise with Venezuela, Russia's Foreign Ministry said on Monday.

The maneuvers later this year will be the first Russia has conducted in Washington's traditional sphere of influence since the end of the Cold War.

Russia has heavily criticized the United States for sending a sophisticated command ship and two other naval vessels to Georgia, on its southern border, to deliver aid and show support for President Mikheil Saakashvili after Moscow sent troops into Georgia.

Kremlin leader Dmitry Medvedev asked on Saturday how Washington would feel "if we now dispatched humanitarian assistance to the Caribbean...using our navy".
I hope you didn't start thinking this world was governed by adults, trying to act rationally to achieve goals. Nope! It's a global dick measuring contest! Diplomacy has been replaced by a system of petty slights, aggrieved overreactions, spreading rumors in the locker room about so and so being a slut, nose scratch middle fingers, breath holding with feet stamping, and loud protestations of "Oh yeah? Let's see how you like it!"

We send battleships to Georgia to show 'support' and offload bags of grain, and Russia decides to send battleships to Venezuela to see that South America everyone's been talking about after they pick up some delicious coffee. Next we're going to flat tire the Russian delegate's wingtips at the UN, they'll wet willie Condi, and by early December we'll be at war somewhere. January will see a truce waived off when a pantsing goes awry.

Bush knows there's only one step he can take now to combat this incursion into our continent bubble. That's to get the really loud planes out of storage and start buzzing them low in the middle of the night near Russian border towns. That'll wake the neighbors. Your move Russia.

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