Monday, September 29, 2008

Campbell's will be the last company remaining

Stocks, Oil Plunge After Congress Rejects Bailout; Bonds Rise
The benchmark index for American equities slipped to a four-year low. The Dow Jones Industrial Average lost 777.68, its steepest point drop ever. The MSCI World Index lost as much as 86.99 to 1,163.38, giving it the steepest intraday percentage drop since its creation in 1970. Europe's Dow Jones Stoxx 600 Index sank 5.5 percent to 251.43, the lowest since January 2005. The S&P 500 retreated 106.59 points to 1,106.42, as only one company gained, Campbell Soup Co.
That's somewhat ironic, considering after the complete world economic collapse, soup, bread, and apple carts are going to be the boom industries. In a hundred years, when everything is owned by the Campbell's Soup Mega-Conglomerate, when they control all media and financial systems, when they start wars and overthrow countries for extra celery in their Chunky Soup lines, when they grind up the disobedient into beef hunks for the Campbell's Select Dissident Beef with Barley, remember that it all started today.

And it was all Nancy Pelosi's fault for hurting John Boehner's feelings.

All hail your soup overlords. Sirloin Burger with Country Vegetables forever.

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