Barack Obama has had a rough go of it recently. According to the media his lead in the polls is a problem, his popularity in the US is a problem, his popularity overseas is a problem, he's too charismatic (which is a problem), his speeches are waaay too good, and now according to the Wall Street Journal, Rupert Murdoch's favorite jangly cat toy, Obama is too in shape, tall, and handsome to be President. There's also a nice graphic with a sweaty Bill Clinton, a photo that makes McCain look like a deranged troll, Lincoln looking like he and the Natives are going to stab Liam Neeson and fuck up DiCaprio with a brickbat, Bush caught mid 'Hokey-Pokey', and 'Big Poppa' himself: Taft.
Whether Obama will be able to overcome these crippling levels of popularity and positive social traits is unforeseen. Aides have been unwilling to enter him in eating contests for fear he will lose and look weak. They also fear McCain will eat so much shit to get the nomination that he will balloon up to Taft like proportions. Perhaps even reaching the vaunted double Taft size, sewing up a massive coronary and the Presidential race, which according to WSJ, now evidently apportions electoral votes by girth and height.
WSJ spent 1,400 words on this. November needs to get here...now.
Friday, August 1, 2008
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