WWBD?

Ew, Barracuda...



What does the VP do? Depends, really. Constitutionally speaking, the Vice President is tasked only with maintaining a pulse and, if necessary, casting the deciding vote in the Senate in the event of a tie. Beyond that, you pretty much make it up as you go along, sweetness. Some noteworthy options:

--Murder Alexander Hamilton. (Aaron Burr)

--Resign your post as Satan's hatchet man after pleading no contest to charges of extortion, bribery, tax fraud, and conspiracy. (Spiro Agnew)

--Exhibit the intellect of a mid-range kitchen appliance and get absolutely owned by Lloyd Bentsen in a debate. (Dan Quayle)

--Bore the shit out of the entire country before meekly ceding a rigged Presidential election, only to emerge years later as a portly, charismatic, Nobel Peace Prize-winning environmental advocate. (Al Gore)

--Jam your fist up the president's ass and use him as something of a sneering, dry drunk sock puppet in order to start a senseless war, empower your buddies in the energy industry to write public utilities policy, and mount a two-pronged assault on both the separation of powers and civil liberties. (Dick Cheney)***

Indeed, as Vice President of this country, the world is your oyster, Barracuda. Do with it what you will. But here's some free advice from someone who will only benefit from your ignoring it: Stop going on television and admitting that you have no idea what your responsibilities as Vice President would be. You are making this far too easy.


***Note: Also shot a 78 year-old man in the face with a shotgun.