The wisdom of Beck

A lot of things can be said about Glenn Beck. Most of them involve curse words and the word 'lunatic'. But one does have to appreciate the complete and total way he devotes his life to finding Nazi, communist, and socialist hobgoblins in every corner of life. "Can I eat Cinnamon Life cereal this morning," he asks himself, "Or is this what Hitler wants?" "Sure the Kansas City Chiefs have a storied football tradition.... but I don't like the tint of that red on their jerseys."

Given the fervor with which he attacks these menacing demons and the frequency of his tears, this quest has probably turned his life into some sort of living hell where he exists constantly in fear of anything he does leaving the door open for socialist parasites to scamper up his leg and lay eggs in his brain.

So what's he on about now? Religion. More specifically, religions that are Christian, but have yet to be co-opted by the religious right movement. They are, of course, bastions of Nazism and communism. Keep in mind that when he was delivering this sermon, Beck was actually waving around a swastika and hammer & sickle.

"I'm begging you, your right to religion and freedom to exercise religion and read all of the passages of the Bible as you want to read them and as your church wants to preach them . . . are going to come under the ropes in the next year. If it lasts that long it will be the next year. I beg you, look for the words 'social justice' or 'economic justice' on your church Web site. If you find it, run as fast as you can. Social justice and economic justice, they are code words. Now, am I advising people to leave their church? Yes!"

"Communists are on the left, and the Nazis are on the right. That's what people say. But they both subscribe to one philosophy, and they flew one banner. . . . But on each banner, read the words, here in America: 'social justice.' They talked about economic justice, rights of the workers, redistribution of wealth, and surprisingly, democracy."

'Social justice' and 'economic justice'. Do these words appear anywhere in the bible? No. But the concepts they represent? You know, equality of opportunity, equality of outcome, human rights, basic equality, economic egalitarianism, the dignity of a person, and care for the poor? That's all the stuff Jesus said. Glenn Beck just told everyone to run screaming from a church that asks you to be more like Jesus, John Rawls, and Thomas Aquinas and look out for people.

Guess what, if you're in one of the churches that actually spends it's time working for concepts of social and economic justice instead of prattling on about the gay menace or fighting abortion through means that don't ever actually decrease abortions, you're in one of the good churches. You're in a church that is actually committed to changing things in a beneficial and long-lasting way instead of waging a Pyrrhic campaign of ideology at the expense of meaningful action that will never be won.

On the other hand, fuck Diamond J. Sure He was all "Treat the poor well", "A rich bitch ain't going to heaven unless a camel trots his ass through the eye of this needle", and "Hey Judas, who're all your soldier friends and what's with the kissing?", but when did he ever sufficiently bash gays, praise Reagan, or excuse torture? Never, that's when. So why listen to him. As always, Glenn's right. Next time you hear your pastor talk about Jesus that, poor people this, healed leper that, run.

And remember: that healed leper probably cut into a Nazareth insurance companies bottom line.