Monday, July 6, 2009

Over the weekend

A round-up of things that happened over the weekend while we were all eating nurgers to the sound of the sky exploding.

Robert McNamara, Architect of Vietnam War, Dies at 93
God, during his all-time record run of celebrity killing, has taken Robert McNamara. *Sniff* and he still had so many ill-conceived wars left to give us. His last words were reportedly either "Yeah, the blood still won't come off my hands" or "I can't believe the fiasco in Iraq didn't help rehabilitate my image by proxy. Fuck it, I'm out!" In his post-government career he took to helping the poor with financial aid and showing remorse, regret, and self-reflection for that whole Vietnam thing. Remember kids, if you want to start a war try to think about and experience those thoughts and emotions before you do it.

Afghan Presidential Candidate Takes a Page From Obama's Playbook
James Carville has decided to go to Afghanistan to help advise the campaign of the man running against Karzai. Carville ought to be able to give great insights on all the strategies that don't work against Obama's, seeing as he helped mastermind some of them for Hillary. They hope to turn the candidate Ghani into the Muslim Obama, which is coincidentally what John McCain wanted to do to the actual Obama. They hope to recreate the whole Obama phenomenon and campaign strategy....except without the whole internet & TV thing. The initial slogan is rumored to be "Severely Tempered Hope".

Ethnic Clashes in Western China Are Said to Kill Scores
You think news out of Iran is hard to come by? Try China. They announced that for some reason there were ethnic clashes in the city of Urumqui, that you shouldn't really worry your pretty little head why or even where that city is, and that as a result 140 people are dead and the number of injured is creeping up into the low thousands. The clash was reportedly between Uighurs and Han over...something....which will never be heard about again. Right now Khamenei is shaking his head and saying to himself "That's how you do it."

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