Cheap Blogging Crutch 07.28

Tenacious G
New York Magazine asks the question: Is Goldman Sachs evil or just too good? The conclusion they come up with is that they're good at being evil. But new information abounds, as it turns out that Goldman was close to collapse there for a while. I think I just heard Matt Taibbi sigh sadly.

Obama administration reveals evidence of global warming kept secret under Bush
That's right, under the Bush Administration they classified satellite photographs showing that arctic ice was rapidly melting. That's right, ice and US Geological Survey topographical studies were deemed sensitive information. But now that the photos have been released surely this new scientific information will convince guys like James Inhofe of the reality of the situation.

MANSON COURTS SPECTOR BEHIND BARS
Yes, Charles Manson is trying to set up a prison recording session with Phil Spector. Charlie still has those delusions of musical superstardom, good to see he's keeping the dream alive. Hopefully this ends better than Charlie's attempts to get Brian and Dennis Wilson to produce his music. What was it Dennis said? "Chuckles, I'd rather see Sharon Tate and all her friends murdered by your minions than have to listen to your fucking demo of 'Cease to Exist' one more goddamn time"? Hopefully Phil lets him down easier.

Gates, Crowley To Join Obama For Beers On Thursday
Our long national nightmare ends as President Obama finally sits down to drink a beer with the loudmouth professor and the blowhard cop who have transfixed the nation with their childish actions. Though given the interaction between Gates and Crowley when they were sober, should we really be introducing booze into the equation?

Why markets can’t cure healthcare
Nobel Prize winning economist Paul Krugman gets all economical up in this bitch as he explains how because of costs and the very nature of medical care that the free market can't properly regulate health care. This marks the 1000th straight time Paul Krugman will make a trenchant and valid point immediately relevant to the current issues debate that will be promptly ignored by the elected betters he allegedly shares the same side of the ideological spectrum with.

House passes resolution that states Obama was born in Hawaii, 378-0
Childish political gamesmanship is taken to new levels as Obama birthers were forced to vote on a bill commemorating Hawaii's 50th anniversary as a state that had been augmented to include a reference to the state being the birthplace of one Barack Hussein "Born in Mombassa" Obama. The potential for crazy 'birther' speeches seemed to be ready for blastoff as Michelle Bachmann blocked a simple voice vote on the uncontroversial measure and made it go to a floor vote. But, shockingly, sense prevailed within the GOP caucus as the conspiracy freaks either held their nose and voted for a lie or bravely skipped the vote. In case you're wondering why health care can't get passed it's because our elected betters spend most of their time dicking around with this kind of petty bullshit.