Headline of the day

American Wins New York Marathon

For the first time since 1982, an American has won the New York City Marathon. By which I mean an Eritrean immigrant who became an American citizen has won the New York Marathon. Good work Mr. Keflezighi, the US does not regret expediting your citizenship for the purpose of Kenyan shaming. In fact, if you know of any fast guys who can help us shame electric named Jamaicans, send 'em over.

This is America, we buy our champions. [insert Yankees joke here]

What's that, Africa? Yeah, it's the return of "We got yo runners!"