Friday, December 19, 2008

A pirate life for me

So these Somali pirates, why do they do it? Is it just because they have no other jobs, the infrastructure and government of Somalia is so poor that this is the best option for them? Money and pussy? The feeli....actually it was the last one.
"Is there any Somali who can earn a million dollars for any business? We get millions of dollars easily for one attack," bragged Salah Ali Samatar, a 32-year-old pirate who spoke by phone from Eyl, a pirate den on Somalia's desolate northern coast.
"It is true," said a 28-year-old pirate who identified himself as Jama. "We are getting very rich."

Jama, who described himself as a high-ranking member of a group based in Eyl, has earned $375,000 as a pirate, enough to buy a Toyota Land Cruiser and to begin building a six-bedroom house in Garowe, the regional capital, for his family.
"Once there was a girl who lived in Garowe," 100 miles from Eyl, Jama said. "I loved her. I tried to approach her many times, but she rejected me. But since I became a pirate, she has tried nine times to get with me.
"The pirates are the hottest men in town," Abdi said. "Girls from all over Somalia moved here to marry pirates. But if the girl isn't cute she's out of luck, because the pirates only go with beautiful girls."
Yeah, the money's good, but the ladies are what piracy is really about. And parrots, bomb ass parrots. Keep in mind that all of this, the dozens of hijackings resulting in millions of dollars in ransom, is being done with little more than small fiberglass boats and AK-47's. These guys have so disrupted trade that the UN is going to send naval support, led by the Chinese, into the area to pursue the pirates on land or sea. Not bad for a couple of guys who wanted Land Cruisers and get with the easily impressed girls of Garowe. They'll all be killed by the Chinese, but not bad.

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