Friday, June 5, 2009

Cheap Blogging Crutch 06.05

North Korea's Kim Anoints Youngest Son As Heir
Scratch any plans you had of moving to North Korea and running for President after Kim Jong-Il kicks off. Seems they're a little nepotistic in Pyongyang. Shocking. Though given the exponential increase in craziness from Kim Il-Sung to Kim Jong-Il, I wonder how crazy we can expect Kim Jong-Un to be? Might someone be making a go a Caligula's "Craziest Leader" title? We'll have to wait and see.

Earth Gets Billion-Year Life Extension
Just in case you were thinking of scuttling your plans to put your brain in a robot body in a bid for immorality just because the Earth only had a lousy billion more years to go, well you are in luck. Science has given the Earth a full 2.3 billion years of habitability. So get back in the garage and keep tinkering, science says it'll be worth the effort.

U.S. Accidentally Releases List of Nuclear Sites
Whoops! Ever have one of those days when nothing goes right? You burn your toast, catch every red light, get shot down by the pretty girl at the office, you lose your briefcase, and then you accidentally release a confidential list of every nuclear site in the United States? Yeah, that happens to everyone. Especially the nuclear one. Boy is egg gonna be on this guy's face if a nuclear site is attacked by terrorists. He's gonna get ribbed so hard at the water cooler.

Manchester United name Aon Corp as new £80m shirt sponsors
An era come to an end. The government is no longer funding the shirt sponsorship of the world's premier (or at least second best) soccer team. Sadly this kills my dream of getting them to put Ben Bernake's head on the front of their jerseys. Good choice going with another financial services giant, ManU. It worked so well last time.

Miranda Kerr Naked On Rolling Stone For Environment, "Specifically Koalas"
Thank dying koalas and a tragic eucalyptus shortage, for a near nude Miranda Kerr. Though this does raise an important question: exactly how many koalas are you willing to make sure die in order to get Kerr to not strategically cover up her naughty bits? Is it strange that I know the exact number of koalas I'd be willing to murder?

Evgeni Malkin's mother's lucky borscht
Want to know the secret borscht recipe that's fueling Evgeni Malkin to the most points in a playoffs since Gretzky in 93 and the most multi-point games since Lemieux in 92? The PG come through in spades. "1 pound any kind of meat, cubed." Oh Mrs. Malkin, I think I'm in love.

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