Sotomayor moves forward

It seems the Sotomayor confirmation process has regained some semblance of sanity. It would have been hard to get crazier, but still, things have been knocked back into almost sane levels of discourse. Well, by current standards anyway. Even Newt Gingrich is on board. He no longer thinks Sotomayor is a complete racist, he just think she's a "racialist", whatever that means. I guess that makes her a 7 on the racism scale, instead of her previous Tufnel-esque 11. Even Christian groups are getting on board, with the organization "Faith and Action in the Nation's Capitol" anointing the confirmation room with holy oils in an attempt to bless the room for a "truthful process for the American people." And if it perhaps leads to evil liberal spirits being forcefully exorcised from Democratic lawmakers and Sotomayor as they enter the room, that's just a bonus.

Even Sotomayor's recent ankle shattering has been met with some measure of restraint. Tom Tancredo has gone out of his way not to mention that white men are sturdier and have stronger ankles and said he even kind of regrets greasing the LaGuardia Airport terminal floor and paying an intern to trip her. Lawmakers are even going out of their way to be more accommodating.

Sen. David Vitter (R-LA) had “a bag of ice and a pillow on hand” when she arrived, and quipped, “I hope you all note that some Republicans are empathetic, too.” Sens. Jeanne Shaheen (D-NH) and Mary Landrieu (D-LA) both signed her cast, and Sen. Ben Nelson (D-NE) presented the Yankees fan with a “snapshot…of himself posing outside the old Yankee Stadium.”

Oh, that Vitter. As long as he isn't paying you $300 an hour to fuck him, he's a real charmer. But I can see why he was nice, he really needs to learn her judicial thoughts on prosecuting lawmakers who moralize about values and nail hookers on the side. And that rascal Ben Nelson. I'm sure there's nothing Judge Sotomayor will cherish more than a photo of you standing outside a stadium. You do know how to pick a gift.

See? Everything is all right. Just ignore the previous weeks. This is a semi-adult legal body conducting themselves in a semi-adult manner. No need to remember all that shame you felt. Blessings! Racialist! Ben Nelson photos! Meetings with Johns! America is back on track.