The World Health Organization told its member nations it was declaring a swine flu pandemic Thursday -- the first global flu epidemic in 41 years -- as infections climbed in the United States, Europe, Australia, South America and elsewhere.It's clear now: we're already dead and we don't even know it. Even now as we speak a Bruce Willis from the future is traversing our great land trying to find the source of the virus so he can help humanity retake the Earth and move out from the underground cities they've constructed. Captain Pig Trips has won, its time to accept our fate.
In a statement sent to member countries, WHO said it decided to raise the pandemic warning level from phase 5 to 6 -- its highest alert -- after holding an emergency meeting on swine flu with its experts.
The long-awaited pandemic decision is scientific confirmation that a new flu virus has emerged and is quickly circling the globe. It will trigger drugmakers to speed up production of a swine flu vaccine and prompt governments to devote more money toward efforts to contain the virus.
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On Wednesday, WHO said 74 countries had reported nearly 27,737 cases of swine flu, including 141 deaths.
Though really WHO, devote more money towards Pig AIDS? It's a waste. We're all gonna die regardless of money spent. Besides, we don't even have the money. Frankly if Pig AIDS wants what money we do have, Pig AIDS better start manufacturing shitty cars or bankrupt itself making credit default swaps on mortgages. we only bust out the scrilla for things that weaken our economy, not our immune systems.
So just in case you thought we dodged a swine flu bullet and were eagerly awaiting a monkey flu or avian flu epidemic: too bad. The global pandemic is here. I'll see you in the mass graves.
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