Quote of the day: Logical conclusions

The American Life League on Krispy Kreme plan to hand out a free donut to everyone on January 20th on account of the Inauguration of this Barack Obama person.

The next time you stare down a conveyor belt of slow-moving, hot, sugary glazed donuts at your local Krispy Kreme you just might be supporting President-elect Barack Obama's radical support for abortion on demand – including his sweeping promise to sign the Freedom of Choice Act as soon as he steps in the Oval Office, Jan. 20.
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President-elect Barack Obama promises to be the most virulently pro-abortion president in history. Millions more children will be endangered by his radical abortion agenda.

Celebrating his inauguration with "Freedom of Choice" doughnuts – only two days before the anniversary of the Supreme Court decision to decriminalize abortion – is not only extremely tacky, it's disrespectful and insensitive and makes a mockery of a national tragedy.

A misconstrued concept of "choice" has killed over 50 million preborn children since Jan. 22, 1973. Does Krispy Kreme really want their free doughnuts to celebrate this "freedom.""

As of Thursday morning, Communications Director Brian Little could not be reached for comment. We challenge Krispy Kreme doughnuts to reaffirm their commitment to true freedom – to the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness – and to separate themselves and their doughnuts from our great American shame."

Of course, why didn't I see it: free donuts equal abortion promotion. Everything always equals abortion promotion, especially abortion, that's like double abortion promotion. So kids, if you really want to combine free pastries with massive leaps of what we'll call 'logic', baby murder, and extreme religious paranoia, and I know you all do, make sure to head to the old double K to get your free abortion donut. If you wish to fully participate in the spirit of the day hand your donut off to a doctor, so he/she can throw it in a dumpster out back. It helps if the doctor is black to fully get the Obama abortion message through. Or go against God's plan and give that donut to a gay couple you know, trusting that they are just as qualified to eat that donut as a straight couple. It's all politics. Everything is politics.

Also: try not thinking about abortion the next time you have a donut or pastry of any sort. Forget even walking into a Krispy Kreme without thinking about it. I just hacked your mind. You're welcome.