Tuesday, December 22, 2009

America reflects on the last decade

As we look back on the last decade and see all that has happened, America is of one mind: let's all agree to pretend we've all just woke up from a ten year coma and don't understand why Bubba got replaced by a black guy. Either that or we're just going to have to start drinking heavily until the special happy Kentucky juice washes the pain from our minds and transfers it to our livers. In fact, if someone doesn't openly weep at the mention of the last decade they are to be deemed Not Trustworthy and A Suspicious Person. Let this poll explain.
Time magazine called the past decade (2000-2009) the "Decade from Hell." Respondents in the new NBC/Wall Street Journal poll don't go that far, but it's clear that many didn't think it was a good decade.

According to the poll, a combined 58% said the decade was either "awful" or "not so good," 29% said it was fair, and just 12% said it was either "good" or "great."
...
What's more, the poll shows that 48% believe the U.S. gained ground over the past decade on science and technology, and 40% say it gained ground on race relations.

But 37% said it lost ground on the environment, 46% said it lost ground on health and well being, 50% said it lost ground on peace and national security, 54% said lost ground on the nation's sense of unity, 55% said it lost ground in treating others with respect, 66% said it lost ground on moral values, and a whopping 74% said it lost ground on economic prosperity.
Yes, as long as we're counting science as a form of technology and not knowledge. Because if we're talking about the ability to find porn, stalk ex-classmates, embarrass oneself on the web, and find porn, then science has brought us much this decade. If we're talking about acceptance of scientific thought like, say, evolution or climate change... it's best not to mention the last 10 years. Still, on pretty much every other issue people look at the "progress", shudders to themselves, and then produces a flask from an inside jacket pocket, unscrews it slowly, and mournfully takes a sip. Who exactly are the 26% that doesn't think we lost ground economically? Have they already blocked out this decade? Perhaps we need to learn from their example.

Unfortunately the last decade was so bad it will reach it's icy black hand out from beyond the grave to strangle the early years of the new decade. But at least this will be good for 2020 polls, as there's no way anyone can possibly view the next 10 years as a regression unless a meteor hits and the humans that survive have to duke it out with rats and lizards for global evolutionary supremacy. Plus the last few years of misery combined with the aught year prefixes will make us some of the crotchetiest old men this world has ever seen. We'll be able to bring a grandchild to his knees with tales of the global financial apocalypse, Bush, and life without hover sexbots. So we'll have that to look forward to, if we survive. Which is nice.

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