Happy Memorial Day

Map of Happiness

The North Koreans have The Bomb.

North Korea today risked further international isolation after it claimed to have successfully tested a nuclear weapon as powerful as the atomic bomb that destroyed Hiroshima.

The test comes less than two months after the North enraged the US and its allies by test firing a long-range ballistic missile.

The KNCA news agency, the regime's official mouthpiece, said: "We have successfully conducted another nuclear test on 25 May as part of the republic's measures to strengthen its nuclear deterrent."

Officials in South Korea said they had detected a tremor consistent with those caused by an underground nuclear explosion. The country's Yonhap news agency reported that the north had test-fired three short-range missiles from a base on the east coast immediately after the nuclear test.

North Korea might not have started the war against the groundhogs, but they sure as shit ended it. But what better way to celebrate a day honoring the soldiers who have served this country and gave their lives defending it, then with a reminder of the next war we might have to fight. With nukes. Rest assured that world leaders are out there right now expressing disappointment (TO THE EXTREME!!!!) wagging their fingers so furiously that the damned things just might fall off.

Who knew that McG's hastily put together, slapdash Terminator movie would be providing us a glimpse of our near future, with crazy Kim Jong-Il taking the place of Skynet. I guess this means we have to pretend they're a real world power now. Like Obama has enough bullshitting skills to fake gravitas with Pakistan AND North Korea when talking about how they're now "important members" of the world community just because they're destabilized shitholes with nukes.

Ah well, just one more thing to make you feel good/optimistic during the long weekend. Happy Memorial Day!