"Male and female are biologically compatible to have a relationship. We can get into the ick factor, but the fact is two men in a relationship, two women in a relationship, biologically, that doesn't work the same." Huckabee said in a recent New Yorker profile.Ah yes, the "ick factor". This is clearly an important reason to deny people legal protections and recognition that their relationships are second class: because you get the willies when you think about two men kissing... which is something you think about more than a gay guy would.
I believe it was God who said to Moses while he was appearing as a burning bush:
"Mo, I know I didn't make this a Commandment or anything, but make it clear to my people that I want it understood that things that make you get the willies in your gut when you think about them are also no-no's. Use that word: no-no's. I mean some things are just *shudders* weird, you know? Two dudes smooching and getting married is right out! Two ladies kissing? That's a party. So sayeth the Lord!"I also believe it's in the Constitution. Something about "If in the course of events you find that the freedoms enumerated in this document are too much and are allowing for things that make you feel weird because you don't understand them, feel free to outlaw them. We are of course talking about James Madison and his 'manservant'. Ick."
I mean isn't that the standard by which things should be measured? If something makes an old Southern religious guy go "Ewwwwwww", we shouldn't allow it. I mean... dangling naughty bits... of the same sex..... touching? Ewwwwwww. Sorry gays, try to ask for legal rights in an area that doesn't make Mike Huckabee's testicles shoot up into his chest. And don't try to counter with some legal mumbo jumbo or a human rights type response. Huck is really wierded out by two men kissing, so you can't be allowed to marry. Obviously. Who can argue with such an intelligent defense of "traditional" marriage?