Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Cheap Blogging Crutch 08.11

In healthcare debate, 'reality' is in dispute
The LA Times looks at the extensive lengths supporters have to go to in order to fight opponents who question the very nature of truth and reality on a daily basis. They even had to create a website and videos to assure people that Obama wasn't going to garrote your grandmother at her weekly canasta game. He's much to crafty for that, he'll just order one of the car companies he now owns to give her defective brakes.

Newspaper Ad Revenue to Recover

If by recover you mean "rise slightly". 2.4%! With a chance that by 2014 ad revenue will increase by almost 8%! That's right, the print media barely gets to see its ad revenues rise with inflation and this is being hailed as the end of newspapers' slide. Sorry, it's just a longer than expected death rattle which at the end of you'll have to figure out a better plan than "fire all the experienced people", "curse Craigslist with every breath", and "hire more discredited neoconservative columnists".

How House Bill Runs Over Grandma
Investor's Business Daily, in their quest to discredit themselves as badly on health care as the preceding years have discredited them on investing and business, tries its hand at scaring you about your grandma's impending government sanctioned murder. The best example they have is the case of the UK's NHS and Stephen Hawking, who they claim wouldn't have a chance at survival in England's socialist health care system. This despite the fact that Hawking is English (that robot voice with the American accent does tend to confuse things), has lived with NHS care his entire life, and is, you know, still alive. Nice try though IBD, maybe next time.

‘Worse Than Doing Nothing At All’
Turns out the Justice Department may finally start prosecuting torture. But alas, in true American fashion, will only actually go after the lowest level operative who did it. Apparently they had no superiors who ordered them to do it after it had been made an official tactic by branch heads on the orders of the White House. Funny how that always turns out to be the case. It's always the grunts and only ever the grunts.

The Future Of Sushi: Farms?
Hope you don't like sushi, or really the entire species of bluefin tuna. Because they're pretty much going to be completely extinct in about 3-5 years unless some severely drastic measures are taken. It has something to do with the fact that fisherman overfish the stocks by three times the legal limit while no one does anything about it and that current fishing levels are about 4 times what they would need to be to not make the bluefin go extinct. Ah well, that Charlie Tuna character was kind of an asshole. He deserves this.

Amy's fairground attraction
You see what's happening, gay marriage advocates? You laughed at us for suggesting that gay marriage might lead us down a slippery slope towards marrying a dog, or two dogs, or sentient robots, or three dogs, or a robot dog, but know a British woman is going to marry a roller coaster. A roller coaster that may in fact be dog themed. Is this the perverse future you envisioned? Just keep your damned hands off Space Mountain, that sassy lady is mine.

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