Broken In Brief: Gym room full of men who totally didn't notice that hot woman walk in

MOBILE—While information at this point is preliminary, sources are reporting that an entire room full of men at the Mobile area Bally’s Total Fitness has totally not noticed that an attractive woman has entered the establishment with the intention of also working out. Honest.

“Oh really? There’s an attractive woman over there? I hadn’t noticed,” claimed the noticeably pudgy George Pappas, 25, while he piled extra 50 pound weights onto the end of the bar. “I’m just here to do my normal workout of clean jerking 800 pounds up over my head like I always do: without a spotter. While it’s not a feat most men can do, I’m not most normal men. That’s just the sort of dedication I put into fitness, nay, all aspects of my life,” he finished saying loudly.

“Personally, I think it’s great that she’s taking an interest in her health, but other than that I couldn’t care less,” observed Will Granger, 22, in the midst of cranking up both the speed and incline of the treadmill he was on and attempting to run in a really cool manner. “I’m just here to do my workout in the same way I always do: to the extreme, while showing that I drive a BMW and earn a yearly six figure income,” he gasped out as the strain of running uphill at such a speed began to sap his endurance.

Others were also willing to come forward and state that they, too, had also totally not noticed the woman, an 8.5 or possibly 9, who had entered, but were interrupted by Mr. Pappas’ painful shrieks as his attempt to beat a world weightlifting record by some 250 pounds was derailed by a tragic ankle shattering and violent rectal prolapse.