Up above is the new first dog, Bo, who the Obama's finally picked and brought to the White House, ending our long dogless national nightmare and finally getting Sasha and Malia that dog they were promised. The dog, a six month old male Portuguese water dog, will take up residence in the WH immediately, provided there are no credible accusations that the dog failed to pay back taxes and Chuck Grassley does not hold up the nomination in committee.
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The Obama's hope to break a long string of Presidential dogs who have, since Checkers was indicted for bribery and racketeering, Barney was outed as the Bush Administration official who authorized torture, and Buddy dug up Lincoln's corpse, continually disappointed the American people.
The new first dog will dominate news coverage to an unhealthy degree for the next few days, generating inane puns, mind shattering "who let the dogs out" references, and one mildly crazed Michelle Bachmann reference about not getting an American dog. Bo will in turn become more famous, beloved, and respected than you can ever hope to be. The impending photo op with Sasha and Malia will probably make you retch your hateful guts out it'll be so goddamned cute. Enjoy your new fuzzy wuzzy distraction, America.
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