An open letter to our readers on this, an almost holy day

Dear Readers,

Be it later tonight or in the wee hours of tomorrow morning, when our loyal Filipino demographic checks in, TheseBastards will reach 20,000 hits. I think I speak for both of us in saying that when we launched in late June, we never expected to be anywhere near this point less than four months in. As a matter of fact, we expected much better, so stop fucking about and read the damn blog more frequently, you ungrateful dullards. We have caviar and mercenaries to buy.

Actually, we both assumed this mess would be abandoned within a couple of weeks. That we have stuck with it is less a testament to our work ethic than it is to the fact that, for reasons beyond our ability to understand, you all keep coming back, reading, spreading the blog around, commenting, etc.. My money's on you all being a bunch of inebriates. Matthew thinks this has something to do with a CIA-crafted nerve agent introduced to the water supplies of your respective communities. But he says that about everything.

So, y'know, thanks and shit.

Yours in Christ,
Matthew and Sean

Dictated but not Read