Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Broken In Brief: Unopened George W. Bush Presidential Library Burns Down

LEWISVILLE, TX--For the first time in exactly one year, tragedy befell the administration of the 43rd US president, as the George W. Bush Presidential Library burned to the ground overnight.

Set to become the nation's thirteenth presidential library, the facility had its temporary home in the small city of Lewisville while the permanent George W. Bush Presidential Center was constructed at Southern Methodist University in Dallas.

Sources close to the former president say he has been truly shaken by this turn of events.

"He's heartbroken," said the source who spoke on condition of anonymity. "Both books in the catalog burned along with the rest of the library. And the worst part? President Bush had only finished coloring one of them."

According to fire marshal Bo Stafford, both the skee-ball machine and the whack-a-mole game have been damaged beyond repair, with little hope for the the ticket redemption booth or the menagerie of stuffed animals and foam cowboy hats.

These tragic losses aside, the board was happy to announce that no Presidential papers or documents had been lost in this fire, as they had already been misplaced during a previous unrelated dumpster fire behind Dick Cheney's house in early January, 2009.

Early word is that even after the insurance money is collected, no attempt will be made to rebuild the library. Instead, the former president has commissioned a new George W. Bush Presidential Library Memorial Grill Pit at his ranch in Crawford.

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