It's cold out

It's a banner season for climate change denialists. With God deciding to take a look at the Mid-Atlantic and go "what if the Great Flood was frozen this time!", that unequivocally proves once and for all that because it is cold and snowing in one area, climate change is a sad, deluded, clinically disproven myth. Except, you know, when the science says the opposite. But who listens to science?

But we already knew that the science for global warming dries up the second someone, somewhere feels slightly colder than usual. But what happens when places where it's supposed to be cold are warmer than usual during periods when it's supposed to be cold? Like places where they're supposed to be holding wintry athletic competitions in the outdoors? And these places are theoretically are having to push back events, refund tickets, and helicopter in snow because of seasonal temperature highs, rain, and melting ruining said wintry athletic courses?

What ever could be the reason? Tim Gayda, the vice president of sport for the Vancouver organizing committee, do you have any idea?

Warm, wet El Niño winds from Hawaii that occasionally bring unseasonably warm weather around the region are known locally as the “pineapple express,” but the effects rarely last more than a few days.
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“We really shattered the all-time record,” he said. “It’s El Niño, and there’s something else that nobody understands at this point. It’s El Niño Plus.”

Yes. What ever could it be? I'm assuming the proper winter Gods were not placated, or perhaps Apollo was over placated. Anyway, while Vancouver might not understand why it's events are melting or why the Olympic Committee is now openly talking about having to take climate, temperature, and other planetary heating trends into account for the future, former Olympic Games host Utah knows what it isn't.

Utah's House of Representatives apparently has at least. Officially the most Republican state in America, its political masters have adopted a resolution condemning "climate alarmists", and disputing any scientific basis for global warming.
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The original version of the bill dismissed climate science as a "well organised and ongoing effort to manipulate and incorporate "tricks" related to global temperature data in order to produce a global warming outcome". It accused those seeking action on climate change of riding a "gravy train" and their efforts would "ultimately lock billions of human beings into long-term poverty".
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By the time the final version of the bill came to a vote, cooler heats apparently prevailed. The bill dropped the word "conspiracy", and described climate science as "questionable" rather than "flawed".

It's all magic, unknowable weather, angry deities, or just patterns that somehow seems to mystically link up with the deluded conspiracy theories of crooked scientists looking to bamboozle the public and thieve money out of the lucrative endless cash pile that is climate science. Funny how it always works out that way.

I'm just glad we learned two important climate facts. Cold and snowy here means global warming is a myth no matter what actual science says. Unseasonably warm weather in a wintry place means... LOOK OVER THERE!!! *runs away*