Did you know there are no less than three blankets with sleeves being marketed to the American populace? The Snuggie, the Slanket, and the Freedom Blanket. Did you know that they were all in an endless and undying war against each other? That Snuggie is an impostor? That people desire to look like terry cloth monks/cult members and suffer the scorn of all decent people? That sweatshirts and sweaters don't exist anymore? That blankets are sooooooo fucking complicated and backwards we need sleeves in them?
Well, now you know. Go buy a freedom blanket, before the poor owner has to explain to his daughter that the Snuggie behemoth stole their livelihood.
No comments:
Post a Comment