The morning WTF

Did you ever think that a simple call to volunteer could be linked to such a global conspiracy to render America into a mindless drone army of communists doing the every bidding of Chairman Maobama? You don't think like Glenn Beck. Really, this is such a sight to behold. He can take anything and spin it into a sinister web of liberal corporations trying to enact the Fourth Reich. Volunteering is the new communism? Yup. Beck has a gift. He's a conspiracy idiot savant. Marvel at him.