Broken In Brief: NFL celebrates continuation of league wide conspiracy to rig games for the Steelers

Rugged Minnesota quarterback Brett Favre, who just has fun out there, is forced to watch as the referees hand another game to the Pittsburgh Steelers.

PITTSBURGH--Following the 27-17 Sunday afternoon defeat of the Minnesota Vikings in which the Pittsburgh Steelers' defense turned two Brett Favre miscues into 14 points, representatives from the NFL front office, the Bilderburg Group, and Steelers ownership gathered to celebrate the victory, due entirely to a heretofore unknown refereeing conspiracy to fix games for the venerated Pittsburgh sporting institution.

"I'm just glad I could be here to witness yet another occurrence of our league-wide conspiracy to steal victories from deserving franchise and give them to the Steelers," said a beaming NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell during a press conference to the national media. "Wow, what's that make it, 530 regular-season games? That's a hell of a milestone. It doesn't even factor in the 31 playoff wins and 6 ill-gotten Super Bowls we handed to them on a silver platter. I look forward to ordering up this travesty anywhere from another 5 to 7 times before the end of the season, depending on the playoff picture."

"Yeah, I thought so. Just look at the tripping call on Jeff Dugan. Total bullshit. Refs had to be in the bag," observed Vikings fan Carl Henriksson, wearing a #4 Favre jersey despite the presence of other, better players on the roster that will actually be playing next year and showing an expert ability to gloss over a questionable penalty on Heath Miller that negated a Steelers TD, as well as a holding penalty that went uncalled during Percy Harvin's 4th quarter kickoff return for a TD. "Glad to see the league is finally admitting what we all know is the truth, don' cha know."

Later in the evening, Goodell clarified that, due to a longstanding pact with both Satan and the Freemasons, this legitimacy-crippling corruption would continue to benefit the Steelers for roughly the next 100 years. Almost immediately, fans of the Vikings, Ravens, Bengals, Chargers, Raiders, Seahawks, and Browns began to nod their heads in recognition of the infernal bloodtrust. Many were heard to mutter "I knew it" under their breath before declaring that this was the only logical explanation for their respective franchise's latest step toward eternal futility, as well as the Steelers' post-NFL merger success.

At press time, no explanations had been offered for the routine ineptness of the aforementioned franchises.