DIY Counterterrorism

So you're mad that in the nearly nine years since 9/11, no one has seemingly taken an interest in hunting down Bin Laden. Obviously there's only one solution: find a gap in your work schedule at the construction yard, focus the religious fervor you've built up over the years, and head over to wander the Pakistan border with night vision goggles and a katana. Obviously.

An American armed with a pistol and a 40-inch (102-centimeter) sword was detained in northern Pakistan and told investigators he was on a solo mission to kill Osama bin Laden, a police officer said Tuesday.

The man, identified as 52-year-old Californian construction worker Gary Brooks Faulkner, said he wanted to cross over into the nearby Afghan province of Nuristan because he had "heard bin Laden was living there", according to officer Mumtaz Ahmad Khan.
...
"We initially laughed when he told us that he wanted to kill Osama bin Laden," said Khan. But he said when officers seized the pistol, the sword, a dagger and night-vision equipment, "our suspicion grew.
...
"When asked why he thought he had a chance of tracing bin Laden, Faulkner replied, "God is with me, and I am confident I will be successful in killing him," said Khan.

If there's anyone who could track down the most wanted man in the world, it's a middle-aged Californian fork and spoon operator who has a notion about where he heard Bin Laden was.

Haven't you ever been on a job site? You spend your coffee break whistling at the tits of any woman who walks by, bitch about the local sports team, then some guy pipes up and says "I hear that Osama asshole -the guy what done 9/11- is living on the Pakistani/Afghan border in Chitral", and you figure that because Randy, the Rand-dog, knows bricklaying so well, he must know the whereabouts of Bin Laden. So you buy the katana and the goggles and book a trip to the Peshawar province on a mission from God to revenge behead OBL. You know how it is.

Because if there's one thing we know it's that the man trying to hide from the world's intelligence agencies would obviously hide in the area that is populated by civilization, Western tourists and hikers, and is regarded as "relatively safe for foreigners". But, then again, if you're on a mission from God and you go where Yahweh tells you.

So we'd just like to congratulate Mr. Faulkner for putting up seemingly more effort to find Osama than our own government has. Hell, you ex out the religious craziness and the fact that he was immediately outwitted and detained by Pakistani police, this could have been a terrible Bruce Willis movie. One can only hope Bruno read this article and is calling his agent as we speak. Summer 2012.

Cheap Blogging Crutch 02.03

Gates Makes $10 Billion Vaccines Pledge
Over the next decade the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation will pour $10 billion dollars into the development, funding, and distribution of vaccines to the world's poorest countries. Why? Because apparently they base their scientific based philanthropic ideas on so-called science and not on the hankerings and notions of former Playboy models slash MTV dating game-show co-hosts. That's a mistake. I think all of Africa is going to have autism soon and I don't think Bono can write a song good enough to fix that problem. You've doomed the continent with your science and philanthropy, Bill and Melinda.

3 G.I.s Killed in Pakistan. Now Can We Start Treating This Like a Real War?
Hey, did you know we're essentially waging a secret ground war in Pakistan with special forces troops and air-strikes and all that good stuff? Well, 3 soldiers got killed in a battle inside the Pakistan border, that not only was in Pakistan and a Taliban stronghold (shocking), but had been declared to be free of militants/insurgents by the Pakistani military, so now you definitely know. Whoops! Much discussion ensues about when we can start admitting that this is an important front, probably the most important front, in the war on terror? Well, considering that we can't admit we're even there in a support capacity, I'm guessing those odds aren't good.

Iran Sends Mouse, Turtles Into Space
Here we are, cutting NASA's Constellation moon program and Iran is launching a mouse, two turtles, and a worm into space for what experts deemed "no scientific purpose." I think we know what the purpose is. With us seemingly abandoning our aim to return to the moon and Mars, Bitches! seemingly in flux, it seems that in the future America will rest it's head under a moon that is half Red Chinese and half Islamofacist. A Christmas themed satellite of terror and communism. This is our future, people: the moon has been ceded to our enemies. We beat everyone to the moon by 50 years and then spend the rest of that time ceding back that superiority in sad gasps.

Iraq war was illegal, Dutch panel rules
I know, what a surprise, but the Dutch have conducted their own inquiry into their own support of the war and have found the war not only to be inconsistent with Dutch government policies but with "no basis in international law". This to go with the ongoing UK Iraq Inquiry, which is finding generally the same thing, but just spent considerable time grilling former PM Tony Blair over his own conduct and complicity with Bush Administration lies. What are we doing? The sound you hear is crickets chirping because to take a look at the massive fuckup that was (and still is) the Iraq war, that would mean we were "looking backwards" and not "looking forwards". So we just have every other country on earth act like adults, review their and our conduct, and declare the whole thing a fraudulent sham that didn't improve anything, while we sit around and pretend everything is fine and don't even make our leaders answer basic questions about what happened. America, fuck yeah! We're adults.

Darfur Genocide Charge Being Reconsidered Against Sudan President Omar al-Bashir
Bad news for all you Omar al-Bashir fans out there. It seems that they might just add "killing a fuckload of people" and "concentration camp type stuff" back on to his arrest warrant. The only thing stopping them? No one could really seem to muster up the energy to care or even do something when the genocide was ongoing (and is still ongoing), so they're having the same kind of trouble mustering up the same kind of gumption it takes to add "and also for being a rotten, genocidal, murdering shit" onto the end of a warrant. Fair is fair. At least they're consistent. Here's hoping they can find the time to bother charging him with this and then trying him for it. I'm not really hoping for much though.

Cheap Blogging Crutch 12.02

Blackwater's Secret War in Pakistan
Jeremy Scahill really wants to write about something other than all the shady shit Blackwater, nee Xe Services, does, but it's just they're given so many opportunities to do shady shit and it is so utterly shady that he's just forced to write about it. More or less, Blackwater is running a secret assassination/kidnapping ring at the behest of the CIA in a program so secret that the White House might not even know about it. Well at least the CIA is getting a handle on this "plausible deniability" stuff, you just kind of wish they wouldn't use the only American organization in the area with a worse reputation than themselves.

Sarah Palin, Israel and Armageddon
Hey, wouldn't it be great if Sarah Palin just started getting really crazy and started spouting off weird Israel related rapture buzzwords, started hanging out with evangelicals who openly promote pro-Israel policies in service of the second Exodus/second coming of Christ/Armageddon, and generally became more dangerous, Jesusy, and crazy? Well...good news then; you got your wish.

UK Iraq War Inquiry: Blair Was Told Iraq War Was Illegal, Decided On War In 2002
Ahh, the United Kingdom, you poor hopeless bastards. Let me see if I have this right: you not only investigated your involvement in the Iraq war, but you did so in a serious manner, and are releasing finding as the investigation goes on? Rookie mistake. The correct way to do things is to admit "mistakes were made", never authorize investigating those mistakes because "they were in the past and we're focused on the future", and then set about whitewashing everything and making the same mistakes, either on a whole new war or and golden oldie.

Capital in the Capitol: Total House Wealth Exceeds $1 Billion
Yup, humble servants of the people all. Plus, as a bonus, their actual net worth is probably more that twice that figure. It's probably even higher, on average, in the Senate. So now you don't have to wonder why no one in government ever seems to be concerned with the plight of regular "non-top 5% Americans". It's because none of them are one, and if they ever were one they've long since forgotten it. Perhaps we need to organize expeditions into America for our elected betters, so that they may study us "normals" much like Jane Goodall studied chimps. Perhaps then they can learn to understand us and learn that we aren't all that thrilled with massive corporate handouts, endless wars, and getting bent over various barrels of their choice.

The Bank Job
This time, it's Vanity Fair and Bethany McLean who decide to take the baton from Matt Taibbi and get in a good couple of shots at our money overlords at Goldman-Sachs. Did you know that ole GS pretty much never loses on the financial bets it makes, essentially has a license to print money because of securities "spreads", and ripped off it's own customers to the tune of $40 billion by selling them shoddy mortgage securities? Probably not, but I bet you could have guessed something equally shady and ethically questionable and been pretty close. I just hope when they're allowed to rewrite our regulatory laws, they throw some of all that excess cash on the nightstand and tell us they'll call us. We could use the ego boost.

Chart of the day

A study of last week's most covered stories from The Pew Research Center's Project for Excellence in Journalism. Which really should be changed to Project for "Excellence" in "Journalism". It found that while health care was the big story of the week, balloon boy came in a strong third ahead of Afghanistan and Pakistan in our intelligent national discourse. On the other hand Falcon Heene, or "That little lying shit" as we all know him, was the week's second most covered "newsmaker". Placing second to the most powerful leader in the world, who also coincidentally got stuck in a balloon, but was able to extricate himself with the help of the Secret Service, Sasha, Malia, and a pointed stick.

I know some of you are angrily saying "I can't believe it was ahead of the two areas we're about to escalate a war in the week lots of big news comes out about it!" I think the better question is: Only third place? I think that had a function to do with the fact that the balloon boy story happened on a Thursday and therefore wasn't given a full week's worth of coverage like that health care bullshit was. I'm sure if that family pulled that hoax on a Monday or Sunday evening, we would have seen some serious media abdication of journalistic responsibilities. As such, real news was actually allowed to break through during the week, though thankfully not on Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and most of Sunday.

Sadly, I think we're going to have to suffer through real news on a national level for most of this week. Hopefully some kid gets caught adrift in a homemade catamaran or falls down a well or something so we don't have to hear about health care or any of our old wars on the evening news.

Cheap Blogging Crutch 10.08

Approval of U.S. Congress Falls to 21%, Driven by Democrats
Approval of Congress has fallen from 39% to 21%. I know what you're saying: "There was a point in time where 39% of the people liked Congress?" Yes, it was the mythical era known as "March." The drop in popularity is fueled by one thing: Democrats. Both the spinelessness and ineffectiveness of the elected kind and the general disgust of the voting kind who put them there. I'm sure this will all be improved by a few more months dicking around on health care before making minor incremental changes.

Franken Wins Bipartisan Support For Legislation Reining In KBR’s Treatment Of Rape
Sen. Al Franken (psst, he used to be a comedian) has a vision for America. One that states that people who get raped, sexually assaulted, abused, or discriminated against while working for a government contractor overseas should be able to, I don't know, go to court over it. And he decided to write this law just because there were a few times where that didn't happen. Seems pretty cut and dried, right? No, apparently this was too controversial for 30 Senators who voted against prosecuting rape. And people wonder why I have no hope for any issue being voted on in the Senate. They can't even come to a consensus on rape being bad.

Pakistan's Military Rejects US Aid Bill
I don't understand. Why would Pakistan, struggling from internal strife and in desperate need of some money, consider turning down billions in American aid? Oh, because it's tied to clauses stating that we actually get to monitor whether or not they're fulfilling their end of our anti-terrorism "partnership." Makes sense. It's much easier to have success when you don't actually have to prove it in any way. I'm so glad we send them billions.

Left claims 218 in sight
It's time for me to irrationally get your hopes up. The House is approaching a majority for a health care bill that is really, really leftist and includes a "robust" public option. It's even more leftist than other leftist House bills. So everyone get excited about actual progressive change of the health care system. Just don't think about the part where it has to be reconciled with a Senate version and then pass the Senate. Still, robust public option! Hey! I can still see you thinking about the Senate. Don't. Delude yourself into thinking this will be the final bill.

Chamber To Apple: You Don’t Understand Our ’21st Century Approach To Climate Change’
In an effort to explain why Nike and Apple have recently taken public stands against the Chamber of Commerce's stance on climate change and have left the organization, the CoC has instead claimed the the two companies just don't want to be involved in a 21st Century approach to climate change. Which is to say, they don't want to deny that it exists. I don't know who to trust here: one of the most progressive corporations on earth that is committed to believing science...or the group that called for a Scopes monkey trial on climate change and thinks the best way to improve the environment is to not do anything and ignore the eggheads. Choices, choices.

Things that don't sound good

Iran Announces Successful Missile Test

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad announced Wednesday that his country had successfully launched a medium-range missile, just two days after President Obama and Israeli Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu discussed the importance of halting Iran's nuclear ambitions.

Gee, after Israeli elections that make the government more hard-line and right wing, the day after the US talks to Israel about "that Iran thing" and Israel's possible propensity for launching some unannounced missile strikes, Iran decides to do some missile testing. Then when asked about the range of the missiles all Ahmadinejad can say is "Oh, they can go as far as...say Israel, to use an example." This sounds like it's going to make things so much better.

Another Democrat Says CIA Records On Briefings Were Not Accurate

The letter makes Obey the fourth Democrat to allege that the CIA's record of which members of Congress were briefed on the Bush administration's enhanced interrogation techniques contained factual errors. Former Sen. Bob Graham, in an interview with the Huffington Post, noted that the agency's records initially had him being briefed four times in 2002 about the interrogation techniques. Upon contacting officials with the CIA, it was determined that he had only attended one such briefing. Similarly, Sen. Jay Rockefeller has said that the records kept by the agency and made public on May 7 contained errors in regards to his briefings.

All told, the testimonies of these three Democratic officials bolster the case made by Speaker Nancy Pelosi that the agency's own account of those now-controversial briefings is misleading. Pelosi -- like Graham -- has insisted that members of Congress were kept in the dark in the fall of 2002 about the Bush administration's use of waterboarding on terrorist suspects.

All right! The CIA is back to actively misleading elected officials and fabricating records on their dealings with Congress. Topple a few African governments, rig a few European elections, switch out that high fructose corn syrup for real sugar, and we're back to the classic CIA we all loved. Some of the GOP, in their quest to blame all the torture (which was awesome) on Nancy Pelosi, seem to want to fight a battle based around the thought that the CIA would ever mislead Americans or elected officials...ever. Of all the battles to fight and all the hills to die on, "the CIA is honest" is probably the one you want to fight the least.

Arms Sent by U.S. May Be Falling Into Taliban Hands

Insurgents in Afghanistan, fighting from some of the poorest and most remote regions on earth, have managed for years to maintain an intensive guerrilla war against materially superior American and Afghan forces.

Arms and ordnance collected from dead insurgents hint at one possible reason: Of 30 rifle magazines recently taken from insurgents’ corpses, at least 17 contained cartridges, or rounds, identical to ammunition the United States had provided to Afghan government forces, according to an examination of ammunition markings by The New York Times and interviews with American officers and arms dealers.

Why does this sound familiar? *cough*Cambodia, Vietnam, Laos, Iraq*cough* "May be", NYT? Between the weapons and money we give to Pakistan that end up in the Taliban's hands and all the equipment and money we give to Pakistan for anti-terrorism work they don't do, we're practically funding, arming, and supporting the fight against ourselves and our allies.Good thing we're not going to ramp up military action and funding into that whole entire area. ....Oh wait. Well.....at least we aren't sending them shipments of uranium that they totally promise to use to build a uranium statue of George Washington.

Al Qaeda doesn't like us any more

See those two gentlemen above with the one burning Obama in effigy? Apparently they want America out of Pakistan. I know, we're not even in Pakistan (maybe they want out unmanned drones out of Pakistan) and they've phrased their signs poorly enough to make it seem like they're cheering us on. But even with a new preponderance of professionally made and poorly worded signs, it seems we're no longer belle of the ball any more. Al Qaeda and the Taliban have found another object of their affections: Pakistan. Oh sure, they hate us, but they want to destabilize Pakistan itself even more.

As Taliban militants push deeper into Pakistan’s settled areas, foreign operatives of Al Qaeda who had focused on plotting attacks against the West are seizing on the turmoil to sow chaos in Pakistan and strengthen the hand of the militant Islamist groups there, according to American and Pakistani intelligence officials.

One indication came April 19, when a truck parked inside a Qaeda compound in South Waziristan, in Pakistan’s tribal areas, erupted in a fireball when it was struck by a C.I.A. missile. American intelligence officials say that the truck had been loaded with high explosives, apparently to be used as a bomb, and that while its ultimate target remains unclear, the bomb would have been more devastating than the suicide bombing that killed more than 50 people at the Marriott Hotel in Islamabad in September.

Al Qaeda’s leaders — a predominantly Arab group of Egyptians, Saudis and Yemenis, as well as other nationalities like Uzbeks — for years have nurtured ties to Pakistani militant groups like the Taliban operating in the mountains of Pakistan. The foreign operatives have historically set their sights on targets loftier than those selected by the local militant groups, aiming for spectacular attacks against the West, but they may see new opportunity in the recent violence.

Opportunity in violence. I'm betting that's one of the motivational posters hanging around the cubicles at al Qadea's corporate offices. This is all kind of funny. For decades, Pakistan has supported and nurtured groups like the Taliban (thanks ISI) and done absolutely nothing to go after al Qadea forces in their borders. Wait, they did take billions of dollars in free money and weapons. They did do that. Now those same two groups are trying to destabilize Pakistan. What's so funny is.........oh fuck, Pakistan has a bunch of nukes. It would probably be better if we didn't let al Qaeda or the Taliban take over there.

Maybe we ought to scale up those drone attacks. Can never have too many drone attacks against al Qaeda and Taliban operatives. Unless President Zardari demands that we stop them in order to save his ass politically or demands that we give him his own Predator fleet which he swears he'll only use on the terrorists. For now he's only demanding the latter. Yeah.....no. As much as I'd like to see Zardari have half the Pakistani drone fleet stolen by al Qaeda and the other half used to stir shit up in Kashmir with India, I say let's keep that technology to ourselves. I just don't trust them to understand our technology when they don't understand our usage of the word "go".

Cheap Blogging Crutch 2.27

Anti-Scientology...Infomercials?
This is a story of one man. One man and his failed career as a comic, his third rate Kentucky Fried Movie wannabe, a Church of Scientology bankroll, financial ruin and attacks from the CoS, redemption in the form of an absorbent towel, and a ShamWow funded war against Scientology. Vince the ShamWow guy, our personal hero of the day.

Obama Budget Includes Funding Boost for NASA
AstroBase Go! Combined with the stimulus package NASA is getting an extra $2.4 billion to destroy satellites and not build me a moon chateau. On the other hand it makes plans to move away from the shuttle, finish the International Space Station, further non-exploding monitoring of climate change, build a robot that will dent and graffiti Chinese and Russian satellites and spacecraft, and a plan to bury Neil Armstrong's bones on the moon by 2020.

Growing hate groups blame Obama, economy
Ever wondered what marginalized, fringe, racist hate groups are feeling about the economy and President Obama? No, right? Because you can already guess what they're going to say? Yeah, I thought so. Still, for the five of you who would be surprised, CNN went and asked anyway. Turns out they're sympathetic to Obama and the problems he inherited, they just hope that he'll increasing spending on programs for students and people living in rural poor areas, seeing as achievement levels are mostly a result of the poverty level whether in the inner city or the sticks. No, just kidding. They hate his black ass and blame him for everything. Plus there's some analysis on how the economy is going to probably swell their ranks and increase the amount of shit they build into crosses and swastikas and set on fire.

Where in the World is Osama Bin Laden?
Hey, remember that guy who killed 3,000 Americans and then got off scot free? Obama something something? Well it turns out some people are still concerned that he's still breathing and planning attacks with al Qaeda. The people at Foreign Policy magazine have gone to the trouble of bringing us MIT scientist Thomas Gillespie's biogeographic data information and his mathematical model for where bin Laden should be. Unsurprisingly it's on the Afghan/Pakistan border, Kurram province to be specific. The town of Parachinar to be exact. N. 33.901944° E.70.093746° to be precise. Though his map does say there is a 10% change bin Laden is in Japan or France. Anyone up for a look?

Presidential bombing

ABC graphic of Obama and a predator drone, so you're better able to comprehend the complexities. Plane predator, not movie Predator. Though that would be fucking pimp if Obama controlled the Predator.

If any of you had Day 3 in your office poll on how long it would take President Obama to get an itchy trigger finger and launch some motherfuckin' bombs because he's the Commander in Chief, well, collect.

The CIA's bombing campaign against al Qaeda leadership in Pakistan continued with two more attacks today, an indication, senior officials say, that President Barack Obama has approved the U.S. strategy that has killed at least eight of al Qaeda's top 20 leaders since July 2008.

The two attacks today in Pakistan's were the first since President Obama took office on Tuesday.

Asked about it at his daily press briefing, White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs said, "I'm not going to discuss that matter."

During the campaign, Obama called for cross-border attacks against high-value al Qaeda targets in Pakistan, even before the CIA campaign began.

Pakistani officials and villagers told ABCNews.com that 17 people were killed in two successive predator drone strikes against compounds in North and South Waziristan.

America goes after terrorists inside Pakistan

In a stunning development, the world decided not to hold off on news making events during the Republican convention. Unconscionable, I know. It seems the United States has decided that taking Pakistan's word that it's doing all it can to combat terrorism and sending them bags of free money to spend on whatever isn't the best or most effective policy. We decided to go after them ourselves.

DERA ISMAIL KHAN, Pakistan — Helicopter-borne American Special Operations forces attacked Qaeda militants in a Pakistani village near the border with Afghanistan early Wednesday in the first publicly acknowledged case of United States forces conducting a ground raid on Pakistani soil, American officials said.

Until now, allied forces in Afghanistan have occasionally carried out airstrikes and artillery attacks in the border region of Pakistan against militants hiding there, and American forces in “hot pursuit” of militants have had some latitude to chase them across the border.

But the commando raid by the American forces signaled what top American officials said could be the opening salvo in a much broader campaign by Special Operations forces against the Taliban and Al Qaeda inside Pakistan, a secret plan that Defense Secretary Robert M. Gates has been advocating for months within President Bush’s war council.

That's really gonna piss John McCain off. He's spent months deriding Obama's plan to go into the Pakistani/Afghan border to kill the terrorists who attacked us on 9/11 and who were conducting raids on our soldiers and destabilizing Afghanistan (a country you won't hear talked about at the RNC) as juvenile, reckless, and irresponsible. Of course you'll remember McCain's speech about following bin Laden to the gates of Hell, then calling off the pursuit once he found out those gates were just inside Pakistan.

McCain invests all this time and energy attacking Obama's sane plans to combat terrorism and then Bush has the nerve to deem them OK and do them. What's he more interested in, winning a war or a political campaign? It appears that by accident, Bush chose a war. It probably won't happen again, but I think everyone at home should mark it down on their calendars.

Impeaching Musharraf. This will end well.

Pakistan coalition moves to impeach Musharraf

Pakistan's usually fractious coalition government moved decisively for the first time on Thursday to impeach President Pervez Musharraf, who has been an important American ally in the campaign against terror but who has largely been pushed to the sidelines since his party lost elections in February.

The leaders of the two main parties in the coalition - who have barely been on speaking terms in recent weeks - announced their impeachment strategy at a news conference in Islamabad.

In the joint statement, they said that Musharraf would be required to face a vote of confidence in the national assembly, with the implication that if that vote did not pass then impeachment would immediately proceed.

Of course Musharraf still has considerable power, he can legally dissolve Parliament to avoid impeachment as long as he gets an agreement from the army. Boy, that ought to be hard for the former leader of the military to get.

According to politicians who have seen Musharraf recently, the president has declared he would not go easily. Zardari warned the president against dismissing parliament as a way of clinging to power. "If he does it, it will be his last verdict against the people, against the people's mandate and against Pakistan."

Yeah, I'm sure that's of real ethical concern to a military strongman who took power by coup. But, dear reader, I'm sure you're wondering what exactly has brought about this series of events in Pakistan. Well according to the news: "the coalition says that Musharraf acted unconstitutionally by declaring a state of emergency last November and dismissing nearly 60 judges, including the chief justice of the Supreme Court."

That barely rates on the list of things Bush has done. Yeah, Pakistan takes it Constitution more seriously than we do. By the way, that cry you heard? It was the furious anguish of Dennis Kucinich as he trained angrily in his basement dojo. Don't bring it up to him or you'll quickly fall to his sword as he parrys and thrusts and twirls all around you like a Congressional Yoda.

The fact is this could very well end with Parliament dissolved and the military hunting for the traitors as Musharraf consolidates power even more. The men who moved to start impeachment know this and they still went ahead with it. Meanwhile in our country you can recklessly violate thousands of laws, pardon cronies who committed illegal acts on your behalf, spy on your citizens, out CIA agents, violate several Constitutional Amendments, and completely politicize the Justice Department to protect yourself from prosecution, combine it with the lowest approval rating for a President ever, and only a tiny man from Ohio seems to view it seriously enough to move for impeachment. Pakistan has a better functioning Democracy than we do.

Now we fund terrorists in a Pakistan/India proxy war

In case you wondered where all the billions we're sending Pakistan to help us hunt down al Qaeda, the news was able to help you out: they're using it to attack India.

American intelligence agencies have concluded that members of Pakistan’s powerful spy service helped plan the deadly July 7 bombing of India’s embassy in Kabul, Afghanistan, according to United States government officials.

The conclusion was based on intercepted communications between Pakistani intelligence officers and militants who carried out the attack, the officials said, providing the clearest evidence to date that Pakistani intelligence officers are actively undermining American efforts to combat militants in the region.

The American officials also said there was new information showing that members of the Pakistani intelligence service were increasingly providing militants with details about the American campaign against them, in some cases allowing militants to avoid American missile strikes in Pakistan’s tribal areas.

This isn't surprising. Pakistan's spy service the ISI, is one of the most dangerous groups in the world right now. When I say right now, I mean since the eighties. They essentially answer to no one and we send them billions they use to war with India and fuck us.

They're the big reason we're so ineffective in dealing with al-Qaeda and border attacks into Afghanistan. They tip off terrorists to air strikes, aid them in pulling off border attacks, and block our attempts to handle the problem. This is again, no surprise: they've been working hand in hand with the mujahideen, terrorists, and Taliban since the Soviets invaded. Hell they supported and engendered the Taliban takeover in Afghanistan. Now we expect them to be loyal to us because we give them money. But they prefer taking the money and using it to help their old friends and bomb the shit out of India, because we'll just send them more money and not really do anything about it.

This is essentially our strategy now, throw money at someone until we've bought their loyalty, then hope we've paid enough to keep it. And we wonder why we're regressing in the area. Not that Pakistan should deeply care about our problems, which are in fact ours and not theirs, but since we're sending so much money over there could they at least pretend to care?

Our ally Pakistan: Closer ties to militants than us

On Monday President Bush praised Pakistan as 'a strong ally in the fight against terrorists' and as 'committed to securing its border with Afghanistan'.

The reality? They aren't that committed.

A top Central Intelligence Agency official traveled secretly to Islamabad this month to confront Pakistan’s most senior officials with new information about ties between the country’s powerful spy service and militants operating in Pakistan’s tribal areas, according to American military and intelligence officials.

The C.I.A. emissary presented evidence showing that members of the spy service had deepened their ties with some militant groups that were responsible for a surge of violence in Afghanistan, possibly including the suicide bombing this month of the Indian Embassy in Kabul, the officials said.
...
The C.I.A. assessment specifically points to links between members of the spy service, the Directorate for Inter-Services Intelligence, or ISI, and the militant network led by Maulavi Jalaluddin Haqqani, which American officials believe maintains close ties to senior figures of Al Qaeda in Pakistan’s tribal areas.

Maybe we need to give them more jets. Same story, we say we want them to do more, they say they are committed, they do nothing and possibly hinder our efforts in the border region, we say we understand their difficulties, we send money, we're worse off, repeat. Expect a few meaningless raids on border groups, no arrests, more statements about 'commitment', requests for cash in non-sequential bills, and further reports that the situation in Afghanistan is getting worse.

Thanks for all the nothing Pakistan, here's some jets

Plan Would Use Antiterror Aid in Pakistan on Attack Jets

Bush is trying to shift $230 million in counter-terrorism aid, nearly 2/3 of what we will give them in military financing, so they can afford to upgrade their F-16's. Strike that, so they can afford to pay their share of retrofitting the old F-16's till we give them new ones. I mean we're only spending $1.4 billion to buy them 36 new F-16's and $891 million to upgrade Pakistan’s old F-16s, why shouldn't we give them even more to tide ther fleet over till the brand spanking new jets arrive. Jets that they don't use for counter-terrorism, just for oneupsmanship with India.

Why not, we've only given them $10 billion in aid so far. $5.5 billion for counter-terrorism work that they didn't do. What's another $230 million for planes they won't use to help us. They've been so helpful, refusing to do counter-terrorism work along the border and kindly telling us to go fuck ourselves when we wanted to put special forces in to go look for bin Laden, a man their country is harboring. They deserve this. It's not like it matters, they weren't going to use the $230 million on c-t, why not let them spend it on planes they aren't going to use for c-t. Can we get them some missiles with pre-targeted Indian co-ordinates, I'm sure that will somehow help Pakistan fight terrorism too. I know I'll rest easier.

The Obama Iraq speech

Barack Obama gave his big speech on Iraq and the War on Terror. His message?

“What’s missing in our debate about Iraq, what has been missing since before the war began, is a discussion of the strategic consequences of Iraq and its dominance of our foreign policy,” Mr. Obama said in a 38-minute speech at the Ronald Reagan Building and International Trade Center in Washington. “This war distracts us from every threat that we face and so many opportunities we could seize. This war diminishes our security, our standing in the world, our military, our economy, and the resources that we need to confront the challenges of the 21st century. By any measure, our single-minded and open-ended focus on Iraq is not a sound strategy for keeping America safe.”

To which nearly 70% of the country said "Shit yeah" and alternately "No shit." John McCain immediately bitched, moaned, and clung to the unpopular war, slamming Obama for having thoughts about Iraq before he completed his upcoming trip to Iraq. This infuriated his speech writers as they had to trash the other McCain speeches complaining that Obama had an opinion on Iraq without having been there in a while and a planned speech that complained Obama went to Iraq and had the gall to come away with different opinions about it than St John. The campaign still hopes to salvage the latter speech. He then pulled out his dick and asked someone to measure it before claiming "I know how to win wars", perhaps remembering an alternate Viet Nam that happened in his mind.

This is of course the same McCain that sees every twist and turn in Iraq as an excuse to pursue the exact same strategy no matter what. Things get better? Need to stay. Things get worse? Need to stay. Iraqi's tell us to stay? Need to stay. Iraqi's tell us to leave? Really need to stay. The same John McCain who couldn't let the truth get in the way of what he wanted the facts to be. The man who went to a market in Iraq and proclaimed how it safe to walk down the street and how people weren't getting the full picture. When it was revealed that it was only safe because his visit contained more troops and weaponry than Patton had to assault Germany with, he feigned a hearing problem and remarked "So?" in a manner that would have brought pride to any four year old.

Obama also pointed out that Iraq was costing us in our fight against the Taliban and al Qaeda in Afghanistan and Pakistan and promised to put more troops there to, you know, fight the people that attacked us on 9/11 and the ones that pose a threat to us. McCain re-iterated his promise to follow bin Laden to the gates of hell. When told by staffers that those gates were in the mountainous border of Pakistan, McCain faked falling asleep and then later had those staffers double the font size of "Straight Talk Express" on his plane and bus. He then equated any difference in foreign policy as "losing" and "surrender", warming the hearts of all 12 remaining war supporters.

Obama's plans also pissed of people like the Brookings Institute's Michael O'Hanlon who vainly repeated McCain's vapid criticisms. He was then sat down and it was slowly explained to O'Hanlon that we're supposed to wage wars to make us safer and not to vainly satiate the inflated egos of the idiot pundit class. Through tears, O'Hanlon wept that if we pulled out of Iraq that might mean that he was wrong about Iraq and it had been a bad idea. He was told to suck it up and take it like an adult, but his sobbing was too self-centered for anyone to care what he thought.

Obama ended on the obvious.

“It is unacceptable that almost seven years after nearly 3,000 Americans were killed on our soil, the terrorists who attacked us on 9/11 are still at large,” he said. “Osama bin Laden and Ayman al-Zawahari are recording messages to their followers and plotting more terror. The Taliban controls parts of Afghanistan. Al Qaeda has an expanding base in Pakistan that is probably no farther from their old Afghan sanctuary than a train ride from Washington to Philadelphia. If another attack on our homeland comes, it will likely come from the same region where 9/11 was planned.”

Mr. Obama acknowledged that the addition of tens of thousands of combat troops to Iraq early last year, called the surge, had lowered violence in the country. But he said that strengthened his case for a rapid withdrawal, not weakened it, as Senator McCain has argued.

He said during the 18 months of the surge, the strain on American forces had increased, the cost in lives and money had grown and the situation in Afghanistan had worsened.

“George Bush and John McCain don’t have a strategy for success in Iraq, they have a strategy for staying in Iraq,” Mr. Obama said. “They said we couldn’t leave when violence was up, they say we can’t leave when violence is down. They refuse to press the Iraqis to make tough choices, and they label any timetable to redeploy our troops surrender, even though we would be turning Iraq over to a sovereign Iraqi government not to a terrorist enemy.”

He then correctly identified that the sun had risen and was able to tell his ass from a hole in the ground in a lineup backstage.

About that legacy George...

Amid Policy Disputes, Qaeda Grows in Pakistan

In case you somehow got the idea that things were going well in the war on terror, the New York Times was kind enough today to provide a reality check.

After the Sept. 11 attacks, President Bush committed the nation to a “war on terrorism” and made the destruction of Mr. bin Laden’s network the top priority of his presidency. But it is increasingly clear that the Bush administration will leave office with Al Qaeda having successfully relocated its base from Afghanistan to Pakistan’s tribal areas, where it has rebuilt much of its ability to attack from the region and broadcast its messages to militants across the world.

Though now that I think about it, maybe the Times has been too harsh on Mr. Bush's efforts. George has said he's working really really hard on this terrorism thing and he's a honest, straight shooter. Let's give him the benefit of the doubt and just look at what's supposedly so damaging about this report.

Maybe al Qaeda has reformed in Pakistan, but surely we have all the necessary field agents there tracking them down and putting them on the run.

One reason for this, according to two former intelligence officials directly involved in the Qaeda hunt, was that by 2006 the Iraq war had drained away most of the C.I.A. officers with field experience in the Islamic world. “You had a very finite number” of experienced officers, said one former senior intelligence official. “Those people all went to Iraq. We were all hurting because of Iraq.”

Well we need those CIA officers to, uh, hunt down all those top global al Qaeda guys that are in Iraq. There aren't any, you say? Well.....uh.....who believes what David Petraeus says anyway?

Surely then, we at least have the resources to carry out what strikes and counter-terrorism actions we need in Afghanistan and Pakistan.

Current and former military and intelligence officials said that the war in Iraq consistently diverted resources and high-level attention from the tribal areas. When American military and intelligence officials requested additional Predator drones to survey the tribal areas, they were told no drones were available because they had been sent to Iraq.

Ouch. Maybe what we do isn't so critical, what we really need is for Pakistan and Pervez Musharraf to take the lead. They know the area, they know the people, they know how to solve the problem.

To get Washington’s attention, the commander, Lt. Gen. Karl W. Eikenberry, ordered military officers, Special Operations forces and C.I.A. operatives to assemble a dossier showing Pakistan’s role in allowing militants to establish a haven.

Behind the general’s order was a broader feeling of outrage within the military — at a terrorist war that had been outsourced to an unreliable ally, and at the grim fact that America’s most deadly enemy had become stronger.

But surely that call was a wakeup to all the Bush admi...

When General Eikenberry presented his dossier to several members of Mr. Bush’s cabinet, some inside the State Department and the C.I.A. dismissed the briefing as exaggerated and simplistic.

Ok, that one was kind of a kick to the gut. Uhhhh, let me think for a minute.

Maybe by some sort of voodoo or other types of unholy black magics, we have divined where bin Laden is hiding so we don't need all the field officers, soldiers, equipment, intelligence, or help and co-operation of Pakistan.

But while Mr. Bush vowed early on that Mr. bin Laden would be captured “dead or alive,” the moment in late 2001 when Mr. bin Laden and his followers escaped at Tora Bora was almost certainly the last time the Qaeda leader was in American sights, current and former intelligence officials say. Leading terrorism experts have warned that it is only a matter of time before a major terrorist attack planned in the mountains of Pakistan is carried out on American soil.

Shit.

Liberal.....media......bias? Just remember, if any attack does happen, that's good for Republicans.

Your daily dose of middle eastern happiness

Taliban Imperil Pakistani City, a Major Hub

PESHAWAR, Pakistan — In the last two months, Taliban militants have suddenly tightened the noose on this city of three million people, one of Pakistan’s biggest, establishing bases in surrounding towns and, in daylight, abducting residents for high ransoms.

The militants move unchallenged out of the lawless tribal region, just 10 miles away, in convoys of heavily armed, long haired and bearded men. They have turned up at courthouses in nearby towns, ordering judges to stay away. On Thursday they stormed a women’s voting station on the city outskirts, and they are now regularly kidnapping people from the city’s bazaars and homes. There is a feeling that the city gates could crumble at any moment.

The threat to Peshawar is a sign of the Taliban’s deepening penetration of Pakistan and of the expanding danger that the militants present to the entire region, including nearby supply lines for NATO and American forces in Afghanistan.

Pakistan Strikes at Taliban Militants

Pakistan's newly elected government launched the first major assault against militants in the country's volatile northwest on Saturday, destroying a militant leader's headquarters and shelling suspected hideouts of other fighters.

The offensive in the Khyber tribal region appeared to mark a refinement in strategy by the new government, backing its calls for peace deals in the tribal areas along the Afghan border with the threat of forceful action against militants who get out of line.

Heckuva job Musharraf! You're well on your way to being a failed nuclear state. I hope you saved some of those billions we gave you to do counter-terrorism against the Taliban, which you apparently spent on nothing. Or lap dances at some Islamabad Filly Corral. What am I saying, of course you saved those fat stack of cash, how else are you going to afford a palatial estate after you barely escape the country with your life. You're someone who thinks ahead. Thanks for hiding bin Laden too, we appreciate it.