Picture of the day

From some bullshit protest, a picture that sums up for me every single trust fund anarchist, smashing up a storefront in the name of whatever: some early twenties asshole in designer, pre-ripped skinny jeans and sandals, raging so hard against the police that their trendy white sunglasses fall off and they sweat up their $120 faux-vintage t-shirt. I bet she was screaming something about corporations when this all went down.

Fuck all these G-20/Greek protest people, the police cannot beat them hard enough.

To the women of England

Thank Jozy Altidore for hitting that post in the second half. Otherwise.....

The World Cup can be a time of fear and worry for victims of domestic abuse as heightened emotions fuelled by alcohol come into play and instances of domestic violence attacks increase. Figures from the Home Office report that during the 2006 Football World Cup there was a 25% average increase in domestic violence on the five England match days in the tournament.

See, we're nice to you England, even though you fucked up the Gulf. You got a point and there's less of an excuse for your drunken, grotty menfolk to hit you. People that look like Robert Green on the other hand...

RIGHT OFF HIS FUCKING HANDS!!! HA!

Something I thought I'd never see

It's the President heading to hostile ground to debate the opposition en masse, much in the manner of the UK tradition of the Prime Minister answering questions from the House of Commons. Or should I say, that was theoretically what was supposed to happen. In reality? The Republicans launched a lot of attacks and policy arguments they weren't equipped to ague in a public forum and Obama utterly laid waste to them.

Health care is debated, hypocrisies are laid bare, Bolshevik plots are referenced, and the President beats, batters, and abuses the opposition on policy grounds. It's a sight to behold. It almost makes you forget that this type of thing, great though it is, will only help politically and not substantially.

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If watching and understanding the full context of how badly Obama made them look isn't your bag, here's a transcript. I'd say that this televised Question Time is something that should happen often, but according to political scuttlebutt, the GOP is already realizing what a political mistake it was to let Obama come and humiliate them on policy grounds on national TV for an hour and a half. Ah well, it was a nice idea while it lasted.

Health care commentary from a guy who wore a sock on his hand

From an article on Fox News' new online video strategy, comes this little exchange from a Fox & Friends discussion on health care.

Referring to an article he recently read in The Atlantic Monthly, Foley says he hopes some kind of health care bill passes, but is concerned. “I’ve known that something needed to be done for a long time,” he muses. “I think it’s going to come down to a watered-down bill that won’t help anybody as much as it could.”
...
But Foley continues earnestly, explaining that he’s had his share of issues with insurance companies in the past, given the somewhat violent nature of his work. “People in our network were getting injured too often,” he says.

Now, "What's so special about that, besides the fact that it sounded reasoned and was accidentally allowed on TV", you might ask. Well first off, someone said it on Fox News. Secondly, someone said it on Fox & Friends, which might be the dumbest morning show ever created. Thirdly, the "Foley" who said it, was pro-wrestler Mick Foley, aka Mankind, Dude Love, and Cactus Jack. That's right, and man who did this

was not only on a morning show to discuss health care reform as it is currently situated in bill form, he did so in an intelligent manner using things he had read and his own personal experiences, defying all known logic of TV news commentary.

I guess the question that remains is, if Mick Foley can go through a lifetime of brutal wrestling matches, chair beatings, table smashings, all maner of encounters with barbed wire and thumbtacks, and still discuss health care intelligently on the TV, what the hell kind of vicious beatings have the rest of the pundits endured that has rendered them unable to? What the hell must have our elected betters in the Senate have endured?

So, Fox? How about instead of another intelligence affronting hour of Hannity, you instead stage a Hell-in-the-Cell match between Foley and, say, Steve "Dr. Death" Williams. You can rename him Dr. Death Panel. The winner/one with the most blood left in his body, will get to deliver a 15 minute prepared speech on health legislation. Think of the ratings! Plus, It might just be the most informative thing that has ever been on your network. Give it a think, we'll talk later.

Headline of the day

Madoff In Prison Fight Over Stock Market

Not only that, but he apparently won the fight. You gotta watch yourself in those white collar prisons. It's shank or be shanked.

Elimin8ted

Semin, through a translator, said this last week to Greg Wyshynski of Yahoo! Sports:

"What's so special about [Sidney Crosby]? I don't see anything special there. Yes, he does skate well, has a good head, good pass. But there's nothing else. Even if you compare him to Patrick Kane from Chicago, [Kane] is a much more interesting player. The way he moves, his dekeing abilities, his thinking on the ice and his anticipation of the play are so superb."

Spot on Mr. Semin. Who is this Crosby guy anyway? Good luck this summer doing whatever it is you do when you aren't busy no showing the second round of the playoffs and firing every puck three feet wide and three feet high. Those poor Washington rink crew staffers are going to have to scrub so many black rubber divots off the glass.

The names might have changed but the script still remains the same. Pittsburgh gives Washington hope, then rips out their still-beating heart and shows it to them before watching them die confused and in agony. "We...almost....had....them....What...went...wrong? Maybe.....next...year." For all those Caps fans who hopped on the bandwagon last year: now you know what it's like to be a Caps fan. Alex Ovechkin? Call up Peter Bondra and he'll help you deal with this. Not just the soul crushing loss to the Pens, but also the part about being a one-dimensional goal scorer.

Way to inherit your birthright as Penguins Mssrs. Crosby and Malkin. Keep it up. Onward to revenge against Detroit.

Broken In Brief: Drunk thinks you should back the fuck... off

YOUR FACE--Without pausing to consider the appropriateness of the comment or the repercussions of his actions, that drunk guy has decided you need to back the fuck off before something bad happens. He came to this conclusion after five boilermakers buffered by Jager bombs, plus that Prairie Fire the bartender goaded him into drinking.

Initial reports indicate that the man outweighs you by at least thirty pounds and has a nose suggesting he is no stranger to barroom violence. However, the pause inserted between "fuck" and "off" was not for effect but rather an involuntary attempt to hold back vomit. Your friends, having noticed this, are starting to think you should tell the guy to-- oops, guess you were too busy thinking to notice that pool cue coming in across your left temple. The blow drops you to the floor like a paper bag full of cold dog shit and you find yourself struggling to remember your own name.

"Now what, you sissy fucking bitch motherfucker?" Commented the drunk as he began laying kicks into your ribs. "Look at me again! Look at me again!"

With the pain resonating down through the side of your face and the blood beginning to pool between your cheek and the floor, sources say discretion, in this case, might have been the better part of valor.