Showing posts with label raaaaaargh. Show all posts
Showing posts with label raaaaaargh. Show all posts

Monday, March 1, 2010

The Empire


What is this? Is it merely a look at the cupola window that NASA installed on the International Space Station so that astronauts could better gawk and gander at the earth below? Or is it merely evidence that we hold in our possession a Sienar Fleet Systems modified TIE Advanced Starfighter AS FLOWN BY DARTH VADER HIMSELF!?


I say yes. The ISS has been made into a TIE Fighter in fitting with NASA's goals of fashioning itself into the space battle arm of our new Galactic Empire. I say we skip past a new space shuttle or rocket system and move straight on to the Imperial Star Destroyers.

Furthermore These Bastards would like to commend NASA for making actual space more like the space we remember from the sci-fi films of our youth. We know you're doing real science up there, but it doesn't really count for us unless we can make PEWPEWPEW laser sounds and whooshing starship engine sounds while we crash together toys we're at least two decades too old to be playing with.

You're up next, genetics industry. Make a wookie.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Headline of the day



Of course it's about wire walkers being invited to cross a Korean river as part of a competition. But for just a second there... I was really worried that Luke and Leia had a blowout with everyone's favorite rogue smuggler and wookie aficionado.

Why yes, I am a huge loser. Why do you ask?

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

This is why we let the Wookiee win


Northwest Airlines mechanics have thus far been unable to identify the foreign object that dented a Boeing 757's nose cone during a Sunday flight from Detroit to Tampa. According to Kathleen Bergen, an FAA Spokeswoman, a bird has been ruled out, as the plane was traveling higher than most birds fly. The damaged nose has been sent to Northwest's Minneapolis offices for further study.

They really should have just called us. Thanks to an anonymous tip, These Bastards has uncovered the truth behind this near-catastrophe. We reveal all, after the jump.