Happy happy, joy joy

From Gallup/Healthways via the New York Times, comes a statistical survey of the happiest and most misery filled places in the US.

The sucking black holes of depression? The Ohio, Kentucky, West Virginia trifecta. I always knew Pittsburgh was a little depressed, but our middling ranking in the face of this three state vortex of misery and pain is practically a Herculean achievement of happiness in the face of the WV swamps of sadness. Christ this survey didn't even factor in the Steelers SB43 victory, that ought to be good for at least 6 months of "top 20% happiest" delusion.

The happiest places in the US, nay the Earth? Hawaii, natch, Utah, and Wyoming. Guh? Perhaps special underpants and Big Love marathons are truly the way to enlightenment. Wyoming? That's just because Dick Cheney had spent the last eight years out of state and the hell forges and pain wheels of his black tower hadn't been running. Now? That place is depressed as shit...and fighting back the demon armies of their dark lord.

What is the biggest correlation resulting in happiness besides living on an island pardise? If you guessed money, then welcome to the land of the obvious, it is money. It's always money. It will always be money. People will live in an outhouse with a smile if they're pulling down enough green. So if you no longer want to live in a depressing state, no worries, you don't even have to move. Just earn/steal more money. That automatically makes your surroundings turn from a depressing gray dirge that strangles your soul into your own personal happy area. Science says so.

One county over...

From Five Thirty Eight's look at Obama's organizing in Western PA. I give you beautiful Washington county, just a 10 minute drive from me. John Murtha might have given it too much credit.

So a canvasser goes to a woman's door in Washington, Pennsylvania. Knocks. Woman answers. Knocker asks who she's planning to vote for. She isn't sure, has to ask her husband who she's voting for. Husband is off in another room watching some game. Canvasser hears him yell back, "We're votin' for the n***er!"

Woman turns back to canvasser, and says brightly and matter of factly: "We're voting for the n***er."

At least they didn't interrupt one of the Klan meetings. That was not a joke. Still, the economy seems to be overcoming racism. I guess all we need for racial harmony is some sort of long term depression. Who knew George Bush would be so good for race relations?